


Like A Joseph

by GhostlyWitchAvenger



Series: Stellar Abyss [1]
Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Academy Era, Anal Sex, Art, Digital Art, F/M, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Dubious Consent, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Masturbation, Muslim Character, NSFW Art, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Pre-Five Year Mission, Pre-Race to the End, Rough Sex, Sex Toys, Starfleet Academy, mentions of unsafe sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-02
Updated: 2017-08-02
Packaged: 2018-12-10 04:28:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11684070
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GhostlyWitchAvenger/pseuds/GhostlyWitchAvenger
Summary: Before theEnterprise, before Leonard, before everything...There was Richard Jones. His first love, his first time, and his first heartbreak.Figured that Set's first for nearly everything turned out to be his personal Joseph Christiansen.This takes place before Race to the End.





	Like A Joseph

**Author's Note:**

> Written in celebration of 1k+ followers on Tumblr!
> 
> This is one big Dream Daddy reference.
> 
> All art is done by yours truly.

The first time Richard Jones spoke to Set, the Betazoid didn’t know whether to faint, laugh, or cream his pants.

He may have only been a second-year, but he knew everything he needed to know about Richard Jones: dreamy, tall, respectful, popular, and completely taken. The blonde certainly fueled quite a few of his masturbatory fantasies since Set first caught sight of him and was immediately enamoured by his charming American looks.

But that was the thing. They were just fantasies. Set was fully aware of the fact that not only was Richard out of his league but was currently in a committed and happy relationship with Elizabeth Dehner, another beautiful, all-American student at Starfleet Academy. Last he heard on the grapevine, Richard had proposed to her at the end of the last school year.

So when the campus’ resident hunk came up to him in the middle of the cafeteria and asked ‘hey, you’re Hiset right? Or do you prefer Set?’, he couldn’t keep the heat from flooding his face upon thinking about last night’s particular fantasy involving a pair of handcuffs.

When it became obvious he wasn’t going to respond right away, Richard’s smile became a little more forced but he stuck out a hand in greeting anyway, “I’m Richard.”

Set stared at the broad hand suspiciously, clutching his food tray closer to his stomach, “I know who you are,” He mumbled.

A nervous chuckle and the hand slowly withdrew, “Oh, guess that was pointless,” He shrugged, “So what do I call you?”

“Uh,” Set swallowed loudly, refusing to meet his eyes, “Most people call me Set, so I guess you can too.”

“Okay, cool!” Suddenly, there was an arm around his shoulders, steering him off his course and towards the more populated table in the room while Richard expertly balanced his own tray in one hand, “I wanted you to eat with us, you’re always by yourself over in that dusty corner. Seems lonely.”

“I don’t need your pity,” He sniffed, shoulders hunching. What was this? It felt like highschool all over again.

“Why, you wound me!” Richard dramatically clutched at his chest, the red material gathering under his fingers as he pretended to swoon, “It’s not pity if I want to be friends.”

“And why is that, exactly?”

“Is it a crime to make new friends?”

“Well, _no_ \- .”

“Then I don’t see what the problem is! Guys!” He grinned his stupidly perfect white smile and the students at the table looked up from their meals, “This is Set, he’s like, the smartest guy in my xenobiology class.”

“Hey.”

“Aw man, I suck at that class.”

Set waved awkwardly at that, a mix of a grin and a grimace on his lips. So that’s why he was invited over here, probably to help them with their own course work. Or maybe not? Considering that everyone present simply didn’t pay him much heed after saying a quick ‘hi’.

The glass of clear papalla juice on his tray nearly toppled over when Richard excitedly plopped him down in a seat, and then promptly dropped into the one next to Set. Immediately, he turned to him, propping his head in his hand as he put a crisp in his mouth, “So, you’re a Betazoid. right? Half-Betazoid?”

“The eyes didn’t give me away?” When the words left his lips, he winced. That came out a lot ruder than he intended. But, it seemed like that didn’t matter because Richard merely guffawed. It was deep and throaty and made Set melt just a little inside at the warmth in his laugh.

“You’re right, that was stupid,” He managed to giggle out, wiping away a tear that had gathered in his eye, “Which of your parents is Betazoid?”

“My father,” Set shrugged, bringing the bowl of soup to his lips and sipping at the warm liquid, “My mother is human. Israeli, if you want to be more specific.”

“So you speak Hebrew?”

“Yep, it was the language my mother taught me before she decided Standard might be more beneficial for me growing up.”

“That explains your accent. I like it,” Set flushed at that, lips twitching and threatening to stretch into a flattered smile, “I’m trying to learn Vulcan, but I’m not very good. I know the people of Betazed like to communicate telepathically, can you do that, too?”

Without moving his lips, he said, “Yes,” Projecting the word onto the surface of Richard’s mind.

Richard jumped at that, before grinning wide, “Wicked. Did your dad teach you?”

And like that, the good mood was gone. Sensing the sudden shift, he cleared his throat.

“No, he left when I was four.”

“Ah, I'm… uh, sorry.”

An awkward silence fell over the duo, a stark contrast to the cheerfulness and easygoing chaos around them. Stupid! Stupid! Why did he have to go and ruin it?

“Could you take your tray and stand up real quick?”

This is it. Within five minutes Richard realised what a loser he was.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’ll go, sorry,” Was all Set said in response, gathering up his food and leaving the table, shame burning on his neck.

“Hi, I'm Richard!” The Betazoid started back in surprise when the blonde popped up in front of him, “I definitely didn't introduce myself today and I want to be your friend! We definitely won't talk about absentee fathers.”

Oh man, if Set didn’t like him before he definitely did now. Juggling his tray, this time he took the offered hand, not even hesitating to return the bright smile, “I’m Hiset Esero. But if we’re going to be friends, call me Set.”

* * *

 

The longer they hung out together, the less Set questioned Richard’s motives. It took about two months for Set to warm up to the idea that the older male seemed to genuinely enjoy his company, and didn’t really expect much in exchange besides friendship.

He could do that. As a show of trust, he gave Richard his security code, with the words, “No matter what, you’ve got a place to crash.”

Of course, a friendship with Richard Jones meant pranks were soon to follow.

“I swear to all that is holy, if you were the one to change my alarm to Klingon music, Dick, I will personally castrate you,” Set hissed into his ear, voice menacing despite the sweet twist of his lips and the fingers digging lightly into the bulkier man’s shoulder.

Richard merely smiled at him, with too many teeth. His nose was still red from the cold air outside, “Whatever do you mean?”

“Liar,” Set whispered, before taking his seat next to the blonde, pulling out his PADD and opening his xenobiology notes, “You know you’re going to catch hell for your little trick later, right?”

“Oh I know,” Richard leant back in his chair, propping his feet up on the table, “I look forward to it,” He winked.

Flustered, Set quickly looked away. He had hoped that when he entered this friendship, his more lustful urges focusing on this man would cease. And it did.

Now, when he looked at Richard, he saw his friendship first and foremost.

Gone were his dreams of hard and rough sex; so vivid that he often had to change both his sheets and clothing in the middle of the night. Sometimes twice. Now he dreamt of normal things that were surprisingly not the horny fantasies of a sexually frustrated virgin.

While his feelings still weren’t entirely platonic, they certainly were more than lust now.

“Rich,” A cool voice from his other side greeted, and he gave the owner a wary look. Elizabeth rarely talked to him when he was around her fiance, and the few times she did, she was distant. Something he had trouble connecting with the normally friendly woman he’d be confronted with when Richard wasn’t around, “Set.”

“Hey, babe,” Richard grinned at her. She raised a pale eyebrow in response, unimpressed. His smile fell.

_Wait a second… they’re not… fighting, are they?_

Suddenly uncomfortable with that thought, he sunk in his seat, turning the majority of his attention to Professor Waititi, who had just walked into the lecture hall.

“You didn’t come back to the room last night,” Elizabeth said suddenly, about half an hour into the lecture. Set nearly fell out of his seat in surprise, but managed to keep his flinch suppressed and didn’t look up when Richard responded.

“I thought I told you I wouldn’t be,” He whispered and Set kept his head down, trying to make himself as little of a target as possible despite being right in between the two of them, “What’s wrong, Elizabeth?”

“Oh nothing,” Sarcasm dripped from her voice, “Just the fact that I’ve barely seen you in the last week. I don’t even know where you go.”

Set actually looked up in alarm this time, all focus on his lecture thrown out the window. Richard had spent the last five days on the Betazoid’s couch in his off campus housing, claiming that he wanted to spend time with his friend and that _Elizabeth knew._

_Fuck, should I even say anything?_

The decision was taken out of his hands when Elizabeth narrowed her stormy hazel eyes at the redhead, taking note of his guilty expression, “He’s been crashing at your place hasn’t he?”

“Uh…Y-yes,” He stuttered, shrinking back as much as his pride would allow him to.

“I’m assuming you didn’t know,” She sighed and didn’t bother to wait for an answer before she rounded on Richard, whose eyes were flicking between the two of them and begging for help. Set had none to give, “Is this how it’s going to be?”

“Lizzie, babe,” She held up a hand to effectively silence him.

“No, we’re talking about this tonight. I expect you at our room after classes,” And with that, she stood up and left in a flurry, her own notes swept up in her hand in one smooth motion.

“Richard…?” Set started, “What just happened?”

The blonde just shook his head, looking upset for once.

He wisely kept his mouth shut and turned his attention back to the presentation on Andorian GI diseases.

* * *

 

When Set woke up with a raging hard-on and sweat drenching his skin, a groan immediately left his lips, “Haven’t had one of those dreams in a long time,” He briefly debated jumping into the shower or just waiting for his erection to go down, but honestly, he was so sexually frustrated right now he really needed to get it out of his system.

He’s done this at least two dozen times before; he knew the drill.

A rather needy whine escaped him when he pulled his sleep shorts down his hips and off his legs, the material dragging along the sensitive skin of his cock and overstimulating his nerves. His muscles were quaking by the time he was able to toss the material to the floor, chest heaving and skin flushed hotly as he tried to make himself comfortable.

Set had to bite into his pillow to keep his moans under control - he didn’t need another complaint filed with the landlord for his obscene sounds - when he took himself in hand, slowly stroking his member as his other hand fumbled for the bottle of nearly empty lube in his bedside drawer.

If only his mother could see him now.

The lube was cold against his heated flesh, and if the slick substance hadn’t made the whole act of jerking off more pleasurable for himself, he was sure he’d have been able to kill his boner with the temperature.

_A flash of hands on his hips and lips against his neck..._

Tears of frustration pricked at his eyes as a soft noise sounded in his throat. This wasn’t enough.

Reaching back into the drawer, he grabbed the toy he kept handy for times like these when he really was desperate for something more real and pleasurable than just his hand.

Set furiously stroked the dildo with his already lubed up hand, trying to coat the toy with as much as possible, as quickly as possible. Any other given day he would have taken his time, probably slicking it up with his own saliva and teasing himself along the edge of climax. But today wasn’t one of those days.

Satisfied with his work he rolled onto his stomach, pushing himself up on his knees and pressing his chest against his crumpled sheets while the head of his dildo prodded against his clenching entrance.

_A cock entering him roughly from behind, hand pulling his head back painfully by the hair…_

“Fuck,” He cried into the pillow when he shoved the toy in slowly, the burn only adding to his heightening pleasure. He was dimly aware of the erratic slapping sound that filled his bedroom when he picked up the pace, his hand striking against his own backside with each desperate thrust as he moaned wantonly, no longer trying to muffle the sounds in his euphoric haze, “Richard, please.”

His cracked scream echoed in his apartment as he came violently, jerking with each pulse of his spend. Set’s hand still moved the dildo violently inside of him, milking his prostate and the muscles in his legs shivering in an attempt to keep him upright.

Eventually, he collapsed in his small puddle of semen, eyes shut tight as he caught his breath, a drunk smile on his lips when the dildo shifted inside of him and pressed on that bundle of nerves.

Guilt crashed down around him for having an orgasm to the thought of his friend fucking him, especially given what the man might be going through at the moment.

Set hadn’t seen nor heard anything from either Richard or Elizabeth for about a week since their little spat in Xenobiology. Without Richard’s daily presence, he came to finally understand just how lonely and quiet his life was before meeting him. He desperately wanted to message either one of them to see if everything was okay but had to practically sit on his hands to stop himself from doing so. Whatever was going on was between them only, they could figure this out with him interfering.

Didn’t stop him from staring at his comm for at least an hour every day.

How pathetic.

Too exhausted to do much more than lay there, he eventually fell asleep, surrounded by the feeling of being full, of soiled sheets, and the smell of sex riddled with guilt.

* * *

 

He had taken his time getting up the next morning, taking a long, steamy shower and cleaning what needed to be cleaned, which included replacing his sheets. The toy had hurt a bit pulling it out, his lube having dried out overnight and he cursed his lack of foresight.

Still feeling as clean as he could with guilt clinging to his skin where the smell of sex had before, Set pulled on his uniform, hissing when his lower back twinged in protest. Picking up his PADD, he headed towards his kitchenette, stomach growling at the thought of breakfast.

“Hey,” Screeching in surprise, his PADD flew from his grasp and crashed against the counter, thankfully not shattering or cracking. Whirling around with his fists up - though, who was he kidding, he hadn’t taken his self-defense classes yet - he came face-to-face with the intruder in his home. His hands were raised in surrender.

“Richard?!” He exclaimed, dropping his defensive position, “When did you get here?” A quick glance to his couch showed a mess of blankets. Richard had been here since last night, and his heart leapt in his throat.

He dearly hoped he had come in _after_ his one-man tussle in the sheets.

Upon closer inspection, he could see the older male had the beginnings of a beard on his face and his uniform was in a state of disarray, “What’s wrong?”

“It’s Lizzie,” He said, sighing and dropping back onto the couch with his head in his hands. Set sat next to him, hesitantly placing a hand on his back in comfort.

“Is she okay?”

“Yeah,” Richard mumbled, before looking at Set from the corner of his eye, “She basically broke things off between us.”

“What, so the engagement is off?” He let out a breath at the nod he received, “Oh wow, I’m sorry, that’s… really bad.”

“Tell me about it,” Richard snorted, scratching at his dark stubble, “She said that I didn’t love her like I used to, and maybe she’s right,” He shrugged, “I found myself drifting away from her and towards someone else. I would have acted on my feelings, but I was engaged to this amazing woman. But this person, well, they’re just so smart and beautiful, you know?”

Set didn’t say anything at that but merely nodded, allowing Richard to say his piece.

“I guess there’s an upside to all of this, right? Now I’m actually free to love the person I want to love. She doesn’t blame you at all, by the way,” He smiled and nudged the Betazoid in the shoulder. Set frowned in confusion.

“Why would she, I had nothing to do with this,” He said, but amended his statement when Richard rolled his eyes at him, “Did I?”

“You’re basically the reason why we broke up.”

That guilt thrumming under his skin magnified, “Oh,” He whispered, pulling away slightly at that. What did he do, exactly?

_I found myself drifting away from her and towards someone else._

“ _Oh_ ! Richard,” Set’s heart fluttered in his chest when a calloused hand cradled his face, gently urging him to look at the other man. For all he dreamed of sex with this man, he never once entertained the thought that Richard would _actually_ reciprocate those feelings.

“If you’d allow me,” Richard said, “I’d like to see where this could go.”

“Wait, Richard,” Set stuttered, “Y-you _just_ ended things with Elizabeth. Don’t you think you should wait a little to - I dunno - give yourself a break?”

“Our relationship ended before this,” He insisted, “I just didn’t want to see it for what it was. I’ve felt this way about you for at least a month. Please, Set,” Richard whispered, leaning in for a kiss.

And he let him.

Set had never kissed someone before, and it was just as amazing as he’d imagine it would be. The soft pressing of lips, sharing the same air, and hands roaming over each other’s bodies. Richard’s stubble scratched against his skin when he started pressing light kisses against his jaw. Set’s eyes closed in bliss, tilting his head to allow better access.

On the floor, his PADD beeped, signalling the start of his classes. He ignored it.

“When I came through the door last night,” Richard whispered against his neck, fingers coming up to pull the zipper of his uniform down. They were moving too fast but _god_ was he ready for this, “I heard some of the most beautiful sounds I’ve ever heard. Almost left, thinking you had company,” Set froze, eyes snapping open as Richard continued to place hickeys on his neck. The other male, oblivious to his panic, pushed Set’s jacket off his shoulders, thumb rubbing circles on his arms and exposing his chest to the cool air of his living room, “But I had to see who it was you brought home. So imagine my surprise when I see you all alone, pumping that toy in and out of you like you’re running out of time. Then when you came with my name on your lips… That was… Hot.”

Set keened when Richard dipped his fingers below the waistband of his uniform pants, three fingers pushing in his entrance with a little resistance. Set’s cock hardened as he instinctively ground his hips down, fingers digging into the upholstery of the couch.

“Did you leave that dildo inside you all night? Naughty, Set.”

He was no stranger to being fingered open like this, but normally it was with his own hand and he knew what would happen next. He knew what he liked and he knew what was just right. But Richard didn’t. Yet, he still managed to play him like a fiddle, stroking his prostate like he’d been doing this all of his life, “Richard, oh god,” He groaned, trying to pick up the pace but the blonde placed a hand on his hip, forcing him to stop. Set threw back his head in frustration.

“I can tell you like it rough, Set,” He rumbled, “But I want to show you how good it is when it’s slow. Will you let me?”

“Yes, just,” He choked on his saliva when Richard took a nipple in his mouth, gently nibbling at the reddening flesh, “Just _fuck me already_. Tell me you’ve got a condom.”

“Are you sure you’re ready for this?” Richard asked, nevertheless pulling the small packet from his pocket and held it up for Set to take.

“Yes, dammit,” Set said, hissing when the blonde removed his fingers and nudged him to stand, so that Set could pull the rest of his clothing off. Richard merely pushed his pants and underwear to his knees, stretching out on the furniture and lazily palming his erection. The Betazoid hurried to tear open the packet, lube spilling onto his fingers as he did so, “Lubricated condom, huh? Handy.”

Richard ignored that in favour of roving his eyes over Set’s body, who paused and flushed at the attention, “You’re beautiful.”

_He called me beautiful._

Giddy at that, Set straddled his thighs, leaning forward to press a gentle kiss on his lips, “Are _you_ sure about this? This can wait.”

“I’m pretty sure I want this,” Richard said, rubbing his stubbled cheek against Set’s before pressing their foreheads together. Set’s breath caught in his throat at how intimate it was. And he loved it, “I’ve literally dreamed about this for the past week,” With a breathless laugh, Set pushed the condom over Richard’s cock, who groaned at the contact, rolling his hips in response.

When Set lowered himself slowly onto the blonde’s erection, he had released a surprised moan as the blood roared in his ears. For all the time he spent pleasuring himself, he couldn’t recall if anything had even come close to this.

Richard’s fingers dug into his hips hard enough to leave bruises, trying to keep himself from sheathing himself inside the Betazoid in one thrust. Set stopped when the head of Richard’s length pushed past the ring of muscle, trying to catch his breath, “You’re so _big_ ,” He groaned when he lifted himself off the head before lowering again, taking more of the thick cock each time.

Slowly, just like they agreed. And it was torture.

Set’s nails dug into Richard’s chest when he thrust up, pushing in the rest of the way with a sharp movement, “Oh _fuck_ ,” He gasped, collapsing forward onto the other’s chest when his prostate was nailed harshly.

He was pulled into a deep kiss as he was thrust into slowly, their bodies rocking together and swallowing each other’s moans. Biting his already swollen lips, Set keened and writhed as his nerves came alive with pleasure, “God Set, you feel so good.”

Quicker than he expected, Set could feel his orgasm tightening in his belly, but it was frustratingly out of reach, “Richard,” He almost sobbed out, “I think I’m gonna… I’m so close,” Richard nudged him upright at that, hands splayed across the Betazoid’s heaving chest and half-lidded eyes burning brightly in the morning sun, “Please, I’ve gotta-!”

He howled when Richard flicked his thumb on the head of his cock, his climax ripping through his body like a tidal wave. The muscles of his abdomen jerked with each spurt of come that painted Richard’s chest, who picked up a punishing pace, eager to reach his own finish. Grunting with the force of his thrusts, Richard tugged Set back down to him, who mewled (which he will deny later) when teeth sunk into his freckled shoulder.

Familiar with his own stamina, it came as no surprise when his erection grew within a minute and already on his way to his second orgasm, especially when Richard pulled harshly at his hair when his pace sped up even more.

Richard released his shoulder to hiss out, “Fuck, _fuck_ , Set,” The redhead reached between their moving bodies to grab his cock, stroking in time to the violent thrusts.

“Come for me,” He whimpered into his ear, “That’s it, come for me, Richard.”

With a particularly loud cry that had their neighbour pounding on the wall, Richard buried himself deep in Set, nails clawing at the Betazoid’s back and leaving red marks in their wake. Set followed shortly after in his second climax, his entrance spasming around the cock inside him.

Set went boneless in Richard’s hold, the both of them panting as they exchanged more kisses between themselves.

“That was… amazing,” Set whispered.

“I’m glad.”

“I’m happy that my first time was with you,” Set pulled back slightly to give him a sappy smile, cheeks still flushed. Richard decided he wanted to see that more often, “Shower?” Set gasped out as he pulled himself off of the softening erection, a hiss leaving his lips. Richard threw back his head and laughed.

“Yeah, a shower sounds good.”

* * *

 

_A hand brushed through his red locks, the owner’s delicate voice warped into sobs and muffled cries._

_“Amah?” He yawned out and rubbed at his eyes. He blinked up at his mother’s form, silhouetted by the yellow light of the hallway, which buzzed and crackled every few seconds. Her dark hair was down from its normal bun and looked like a tangled mess. Set looked to the dirty window._

_The stars were out. The sun was not up. Why was he up?_

_“Why are you sad?” He asked instead, forcing his tired, tiny body to sit upright, “Would you like a kiss from Miri, amah?” He held out his well-loved tribble plushie to his mother, who smiled softly at him, her dark eyes still sad even to his four-year old mind._

_“No, tateleh,” She whispered, caressing his cheek, “Miri cannot cure my sadness, no matter how wonderful her kisses are.”_

_“What about my kisses, amah? Would they help?” Set untangled himself from his ratty old quilt, climbing into her lap and placing his tiny hands on her face, “I will give you all of my kisses if they will make you happy.”_

_“Oh, matoki,” His mother placed a kiss upon his forehead, “You are too good for this world.”_

_Little Set did not know what to say to that, so instead, he asked, “Where is abba? He can make you happy,” She released a shaky, watery sigh, her quiet cries returning. Fearing he had done something to upset his mother further, Set wrapped his arms as far as they could go around her frame._

_She returned the hug, sniffling into his hair, “Abba is gone, matoki. He left us.”_

“Set?”

The Betazoid blinked bleary eyes open, sniffing back the last remaining tears from his dream. Richard’s concerned face swam into focus, his hand stroking his hair like his mother had done all those years ago.

He pulled the grey fleece up around his shoulders, “I’m sorry, did I wake you?”

“No, I was already up,” Richard continued to run his fingers through his hair, “Do you… want to talk about it? I heard you say ‘abba’ and ‘amah’ a lot in your sleep. Is that Hebrew?”

Set sighed, scooting closer to the other’s body heat and tucking his head under his chin, “Yeah. ‘Abba’ is father, while ‘amah’ is mother. It was…” He swallowed thickly and Richard pulled him closer, placing a kiss in his hair, “It was the night my father left.

“I was four, but I remember it like it was yesterday. He had packed his things while my mother was in the room. She tried to plead with him to stay. Said that he couldn’t abandon her, nor me,” A sob bubbled past his lips before he could stop it, “But I… _we_ weren’t ever a priority for him. We were second-best to the Andorian couple he met on one of his missions.”

Richard didn’t speak, simply rubbing soothing circles over his bare back as he spilt his past for him to see.

“As a Starfleet officer, he was the one who earned most of the credits, so when he left us with nothing, my mother had to start working again. I didn’t fully understand what was happening until I was older,” Set sighed, “God, I was so angry when I was young. Amah would come home late at night, too tired to love me, but not tired enough to skip the wine. I became resentful.

“She worked so hard to put food on the table; to make sure I had what I needed when I started working too. Sometimes she skipped meals so I could eat, and do you want to know how I repaid her?” He fisted the blanket in his hands, tears leaking from his eyes as he clenched them shut, “I nearly beat a kid to death, in highschool, because he just hit me one too many times. And then I ran off to Starfleet and left her behind. Just like my father.”

“You are not your father,” Richard whispered into his hair, “Dammit you put other people before yourself so much. You _care_. That’s more than enough.”

Set released a shaky breath at that.

“I’m not sure about that, Richard. But… thank you.”

They had missed a full day of classes, but neither minded in the least. The next month had been the happiest he could ever remember being. Even though Richard didn’t want to go public with their relationship quite yet, Set was perfectly content with what he had behind closed doors, where they cuddled and bared their souls to each other. They danced around each other in the kitchen in harmony, cooking meals together and belting the lyrics out to the songs on the radio.

Then there were the days where they laid in bed for hours, sometimes making love (because that’s what it was, not just sex) and sometimes just basking in each other’s presence.

Maybe it was more bliss than happiness, and in Set’s opinion, that was better.

But ignorance is bliss, or so they say.

So when Richard doesn’t come home - and the fact that he thought of it as _their_ home made him giddy - one night, nearly a month and a half after they started their relationship, Set wasn’t worried too much. Besides, he was there come morning, bustling around in the kitchen and already in his uniform.

Wait, none of Richard’s uniforms were here. Elizabeth had agreed for most of Richard’s clothing to be kept in what used to be their shared dorm, so as to dispel any rumours.

“Mornin’,” Set yawned, pulling his sleep shorts up higher as he padded into the living room, “Did you go see Elizabeth last night?” He smiled as thanks when Richard presented him with a plate of eggs and potatoes.

“Yeah, I actually wanted to talk to you about that,” The blonde sat across from him with a plate of his own. Set’s forkful of the, frankly, sinful potatoes stopped on its way to his mouth, before he lowered it back down to the plate, “Lizzie and I talked last night.”

This… didn’t feel right. The air between them was thick with tension, and not the good kind.

“We talked for a long time, actually. There might have been some yelling, and crying, if I’m to be honest,” Richard wouldn’t look him in the eye, choosing to push his eggs around on his plate, “But we… ultimately, there was reconciliation.

“I’m sorry, Set. But I want to make things work with Lizzie. Did you know she still wore the ring I gave her, after all this time?” He actually looked apologetic when he finally looked up at Set, who had leaned back in his chair and was staring at him with wide eyes, “I know. I shouldn’t have done any of what I’ve done in the past months. I didn’t mean to hurt you. And I’m really sorry you got caught up in all of this. I think I just felt… lonely.”

Set didn’t know if he was more hurt or angry, but either way, tears pricked at his eyes and he curled his hands into fists, “...Oh.”

“You’ve come to mean so much to me, Set. But I think that maybe we’re just better off as friends, this whole thing with you has made me realise that I still love Lizzie, very much.”

“So,” Set whispered, clearing his throat to keep it together, “When you said you cared for me… that was a lie? Was this all some big joke to you?”

“No!” Richard yelled, and Set flinched back at the sudden volume. The older student took a deep breath before continuing, “No. I really did feel about you like that at one point. I guess it’s just been lust, recently. Don’t get me wrong, you’re a beautiful man and you’re really good in bed, but it’s not the same anymore.”

“You were awfully attentive of my emotions for _just_ lust,” He furiously wiped at the couple of tears that had managed to find their way down his cheeks, “You were awfully willing to take my virginity for _just_ lust. You’re basically saying that you’ve been using me for sex for who knows how long!”

“Don’t make me out to be the bad guy here, Set,” Richard started to look a little angry, but Set couldn’t bring himself to care, especially when he spied the duffle by his apartment door. Richard’s next words didn’t hurt as much as seeing that black bag, “I would have stayed with you if I didn’t still love Lizzie. You’re so much better than her in bed, but I still want to marry her.”

“You packed when I was asleep,” He said, disbelief colouring his features, “You packed… when I was asleep. You fucking bastard.”

“Yeah, I figured I’d leave this morning, after telling you and making you breakfast. I don’t see the big deal.”

The Betazoid stood up abruptly at that, chair knocking to the floor as he stumbled to his feet, “No big deal?! You know, I thought that maybe, for once, I had met someone besides my mother who wouldn’t place me second to _anything_. But here we are!” He gestured to the two of them, a hysterical smile on his lips, “You’re leaving me like my father did all of those years ago because I’m just not good enough, I guess!”

“At least I have the decency to say goodbye first!” Richard stood, a scowl on his face and his hand clenched at his sides, “And stop crying! It’s getting ridiculous!” This was not the man he had fallen in love with. The man he loved wouldn’t have been so cruel to him, not like this. Had he been so blind this whole time?

Set let out a restrained sob at that thought, “That’s all you have to say? That you did one thing different from my father, which doesn’t make a lick of difference by the way? He said goodbye to my _mother_ , but he still left a hole where her heart should be.”

“I don’t know what you want me to say.”

“You know what? There isn’t anything you can say to me that I want to hear,” Through angry tears, he grabbed the duffle bag from the ground and threw it at the blonde, who managed to catch it before it fell to the ground, “Get the _fuck_ out my home. You think we can still be friends after the shit you just pulled? Yeah right.”

“Wait, Set - ,” Richard reached for his arm, but Set just shoved him back.

“ _Don’t touch me!_ ” He screamed, “You’ve done enough of that. I want you to fucking leave, right now!” Richard still didn’t move, but he didn’t reach for him again. The longer the silence passed, the harder Set’s chin trembled.

“I’m sorry,” Richard said.

“Sorry that you hurt me? Or sorry that you were the one to hurt me?”

Slamming the door shut as soon as Richard left, Set slid to the floor with his head in his hands, letting the sobs in his throat burst free. He fumbled for his communicator, flipping it open and calling the number he only dialled on the holidays.

“Hello?”

“Amah?” He cried, “Why weren’t we good enough for abba?”

“Oh, tateleh,” His mother’s accented voice crackled over the small speaker, “I wish I could tell you why. It has been so long since you have asked me that. What is wrong? It hurts to hear you so sad.”

“I met someone, amah,” He cried harder, nearly making his words unintelligible, “I met someone and I love him so much.”

“Matoki, that is a good thing!” She sounded genuinely happy for him, something that brought a bitter smile to his face, “But then why are you crying?”

“He left me like abba did!” Set wailed, and he would have been embarrassed if he didn’t _hurt_ , “He packed his bag when I was asleep, and he told me he didn’t love me anymore. He told me he loved someone else more than me. You were right, Starfleet officers always leave!”

A sharp inhale was all he needed to know that his mother grieved with him, “I am only an hour away at the moment, do you want me to come to you?”

“Please, amah,” He sniffed, “I’m sorry I didn’t listen but I need you.”

“This is not your fault, Set,” She said, sounding out of breath as the faint sound of a door closing came through the speaker, “Keep talking to me. I want to know who I need to hit when I get there.”

A watery laugh was wrenched past his lips before he could stop it, “His name’s Richard. He’s tall and handsome. American. Command track,” His breath hitched, “I had sex with him. I gave him my virginity. He basically told me that near the end, he only stayed with me because I was good in bed. I feel so _used_ and dirty.”

Banging on his door cut off whatever his mother was going to say to that, the vibrations running down his back, “Have some dignity and stop your whining,” An angry voice shouted, “Some of us are trying to live our lives without someone else’s misery!” They didn’t wait for an answer as they stalked off, their footsteps slowly fading in the distance.

He put a hand over his mouth to stifle his tears.

“Was that Richard?”

“No, amah,” He whimpered, “Just a neighbour. These apartment walls are thin and sound travels easily.”

“Okay, matoki,” She soothed, “I can tell you are too upset to calm down. Take a bath, and sleep. I will let myself in.”

“I love you, amah.”

“Ani ohev otach.”

She arrived when he was still in the small bath, hunched over himself in the cool water as he furiously scrubbed at his reddening skin. Set’s frame shook with his sobs, his damp hair sticking to his forehead.

Yael Cohen-Esero simply held her son close, paying no attention to the water quickly soaking her clothes as he clung to her, “Shh,” She hushed, “I am here for you. Do not cry.”

“I still feel dirty,” He croaked, his tears eventually slowing to a stop.

“I know,” She said, “Come, let us get you out of this tub. That is not something that can be washed away with water or sonics.”

When he stood and wrapped a robe around his naked form, Yael wanted to cry herself. He had love bites and hickeys dotting his skin, temporary reminders of what he’d just lost, “I got your hijab wet, amah.”

She waved his concern away, “It does not matter when you are upset,” She ushered him towards his bedroom, “I want you to talk me through what happened, then you will sleep.”

And that’s what he did. He told her everything: about how Richard had never spoken to him until the start of this year, about how he had pleasured himself to thoughts of him, about how he had eventually fallen in love with the American once they became friends, about how Richard had left his fiance for him, about how he lost his virginity to the first man he loved, and about what happened when he woke up this morning.

“And you want to know what the worst thing is?” He slurred, eyes fluttering with exhaustion, “I still love him. Despite how angry I was; how much he hurt me, I still love him. And I want him to be happy, even if it’s not with me. I’m just too tired to be angry anymore.”

“I meant it when I said you are too good for this world,” Yael smiled sadly down at the boy - because that’s what he’ll always be to her - in her lap, who was slowly drifting off to sleep, “No one deserves you. Not even me.”

Set’s mother stayed for lunch and dinner, and in between meals they just sat on his couch, watching old holo-vids as he braided her dark hair. She left the next morning with her hijab back in place and with the words, “Things will get better. No one can say how long it will take, but they will. Believe that.”

And he did.

Of course, things get worse before they can get better.

Seeing Richard and Elizabeth every now and then in his classes made it difficult to focus. Richard had moved on quickly, always absorbed in either taking notes or gazing lovingly at his fiance.

Outside of class, Set drowned himself in coursework. And if he did everything that he needed for a good grade, he went to the seedier streets of San Francisco, jumping from bar to bar until he found a suitable partner for the night.

Female, male, somewhere in between, human, Orion, Andorian, tentacled, dangerous… He had fucked them or gotten fucked by them all. Some liked it gentle, some didn’t want to look at him, some liked it so rough he bled, and some invited others to join them. He’s lucky he hadn’t caught anything yet or gotten impregnated by some mystery alien species he didn’t know about.

Unable to keep anything from his mother, he confessed to her during their more frequent calls that he’d been taking people to bed nearly every night since she’d left, and she had a few choice words for him. She conceded she couldn’t force him to do anything, but that she wanted him to be careful.

A nurse by the name of Chapel had had a serious talk with him when he came in with a split lip and a broken cheekbone, the result of him saying ‘no’ to a tall Orion male who had resorted to violence before his female counterpart had intervened by secreting her pheromones.

He didn’t remember much after that.

Needless to say, it wasn’t the first time he’d been admitted to medical due to his self-destructive sex adventures.

In the end, Chapel had repaired the damage and sent him off with a warning of, “If I ever see you in here for something like this again I’ll chain you to the bed,” Now, he avoided trips to the hospital.

What really got him to stop, however, was when a rumour started going around campus about his sexual habits. He must have slept with a student - which he normally avoided doing for this exact reason - while he was drunk because soon he either got snide comments about his ‘whorish’ behaviour or received propositions for orgies.

Eventually, they ceased. His grades improved. He smiled more. He changed his security codes. And if he got the urge, he turned towards his hand more often than another person.

Things were better. They certainly weren’t great, but things were… okay.

And then he met Leonard McCoy.

**Author's Note:**

> The dialogue where Richard breaks things off is a variation of Joseph's ending from Dream Daddy. I felt the need to base it off of that because I found it to be such bullshit and it needed to be addressed.
> 
> Set's mother, Yael, is an Israeli Muslim. If her behaviour doesn't follow Islam correctly, please let me know. I wasn't sure if there were any rules when it came to a mother interacting with her child, and I didn't know where to look.
> 
> Hebrew words (do let me know if I screwed them up):  
>  _Tateleh_ \- Little boy  
>  _Matoki_ \- Sweetie  
>  _Ani ohev otach_ \- I love you (to male)


End file.
